Tuesday, May 20, 2008

You can take him anywhere once...

... Wayne Sullivan, that is, whose email report of the excellent Broomie's Wall Ride eclipses anything I could have composed myself.

Some names have been omitted to protect the innocent.

Subject: THE WALL - BRAGGING RIGHTS
Hey Monkeyman,
This short correspondence to keep you up to speed and advise you of what you missed out on.


We did it as promised while you lay comatose in your lovers arms.

It was a loose pelican of riders that trundled South and wound our way around some nice country roads to the base of the Bombay's and over a few small lumps (some of which I thought were a bit "wall like") until at last there it was, rising before us like a gray curtain on a green wall. Indeed it was a wall. Fuck!

As we approached this cyclists nightmare I swear I heard an announcement which said "fat people or old people line up at the back please", so I did, and stayed right there until the top, coming over the final crest a sad and sorry last. (But Hell man, it was nothing, I'd do it again tomorrow.)
As I cleared the last bit I swear I heard another voice, this time from somewhere above that said something like "blessed are the weak for they will provide us with mirth" (I think it was a sign from God.)

After this part of the ride I "came right" and rode with some aplomb, and back at Ramarama the bunch stopped for a banana and a beer, but Gaz and I being latish for our tea party, rode on alone (except for a beautiful young escort) The three of us powered all the way back to Otahuhu at a good clip, with my brother in the van for the whole distance and us two (me and the babe) hanging on for grim death.

To summarise I have to say "we done it Mr Monkeyman" and you didn't, now harden the fuck up.......

Kind regards as always.

Richard Branson.

2 comments:

ames said...

nice action shots! but where's the food shot?? ;)

David Benson said...

Sorry! A major letdown for aficionados of pub chips and nachos.